Telephone

GAGA
First of all this song is not as good as Bad Romance
And it's not even close to Poker Face or Just Dance

So I will distract them by getting half naked
And throw everything at them but the kitchen sink sink

The kitchen sink sink
What do you think think?
I will prove that I dont have a penis wink wink

First I'll get stripped naked by some burly prison guards
Then make out with a shemale in the prison yard yard

BEYONCE
This video seems goofy you should just do it alone
Besides I'm getting sick of all these songs about phones

GAGA
You bail me out of jail then we pause for some bad dialogue
We poison everyone including a cute dog Then we start to dance and there's dead people everywhere
As usual I'll have lots crazy crap in my hair

PPPPPPPPProduct Placement
Hide the ddead bodies in the bbbasement

Blood and guts and boobs and buts
And I just want to make your head explode

Beep beep beep bbbeep beep beep
That was Lady Gaga in Morse code

BEYONCE
If you think I'm doing this
Then you're a crazy bastard
You musta blown a gasket
Are you trippin' on acid
As a child were you abused by some big crazy bastard
And did he ever make you place the lotion in the basket

I just want to do a simple shoot with dancin'
You used to be a diva now you're Marilyn Manson

GAGA
You're gonna do my video and do it my way
I'd hate for something bad to happen to your family ay

BEYONCE
My family ay? GAGA
That's right Beyonce
A piano might accidentally fall on Jay-Z

BEYONCE
Somebody help me cause I don't want to sing anymore
She's got a gun to my head on the dance floor

GAGA
Rubadubdub three nuns in a tub
And their doin' it with a garden gnome

BEYONCE
Please don't beat me up but I have to ask
What does that have to do with a telephone?