Stan the man

Born in 1935 in Brooklyn, New York
The son of Anna and Phil
At 19 years old he married my mother Judy
And immediately paid his first Bloomingdale's bill

Right away they started on a family
Three smart kids popped out of Mom's tummy
But then one steamy night Dad forgot to wear his raincoat
Nine months later out came the dummy

But he…took care... of me

Oh, Stan the Man was my hero
The coolest guy ever I swear
He stayed up all night making me a clay volcano
That's how I won the science fair

He was 6 foot 2 and 250 pounds
And as sweet as he was strong
He was also known to be pretty well-endowed
But, believe me, he didn't pass that one along

His favorite singers were Leon Redbone and Johnny Cash
His favorite ballplayers were Koufax and Mickey
His favorite restaurant was the Stage Delicatessan
His favorite movie was Little Nicky
(Sorry G-dfather 1 and 2... maybe next time)

Yeah, Stan the Man was my hero
With a golf swing that made men cry
He'd take their money and put it in his top dresser drawer
Then I'd steal it so I could get high

But he…beat that habit…out of me…

So, Dad, thanks for letting me stay up late to watch Johnny Carson
Thanks for coaching all our games at Livingston Park
Thanks for telling me to always punch a kid in the face
If he made an anti-Semitic remark

Yeah, and don't worry about Mom we'll always look after her
Me, Scott, Val, Liz and the grandkids
And when Jackie and I have children of our own
We'll try to raise them just the way you did.

So say "hi" to both my grandmas and grandpas
Tell my dog Meatball I miss him so
But most importantly, Dad, take advantage of being in heaven
And go bang Marilyn Monroe

Mom said…it's cool…just wear a raincoat…

Oh, Stan the Man was my hero
Still is and always will be
'Cause he didn't give too much a crap about nothin'
Except loving his family

Whoa, Stan…the Man…is gone…but will always live on…