Outta hand

They say that you want what you can't have
but I take it to heart, the thought it drives me mad
At night it gets worse
Follow suit to the things that make so
I'm told that you get what you deserve
forgot what I learned
Lost time, outta hand
Follow suit to the things that let me go

Heavy breathing, I'm staring at the ceiling
the blood is not returning to my toes or to my finger tips
and now they're rushing me, everyone is hushing me
Telling stories best kept behind these lips
But when the walls start to cave in
the tally marks that I left will represent
all the days that I spent wondering They call it karma but it's something that I never wanted
to take the time to fully understand
at night it gets worse, follow suit to the things that make me so

Theres ground beneath my feet but somehow I keep sinking
Theres air inside my chest but I am barely breathing
I need a sedative but I can't swallow it, so I crush it up