Forced life

Images still in my head of you dead
i wish i could take them away instead
i sit in my room alone and cry over my loss
will anything ever be the same?
i wish i could imagine you happy
a life of ecstasy that would be good enough to stop the pain that lingers
in my heart i know i would be content
it's your forced life...doesn't it feel the same to you?
i sit and wonder
while you ponder of pathetic items that bring you happiness
those things that put a smile to your face
are the things that kill me inside
i know deep down you have a good heart
but why am i never included in all of this?
i take you in...rise you up, yet my soul stays untouched?
nothing ever changes in your mind
nothing ever changes
stick your hate to me
i'll find a way to break free