Dragons (you know i love you)

There are certain times
when i wished i wasn't so alive,
and i would take it out on people
like they were dead
i blow them away with words so red,
chops their skulls from their shoulders,
and they run circles
till they fall off the face of the earth
it only works if i know enough
about you to pierce your heart,
your soul, and if you've pierced mine
it only works if you've touched me
soft with patterns of trust
i disengage the bond
if my paranoia seeps to the surface like vomit
why do you even bother?
it happens when i hate myself to the bone
broken mirror i feel alone
did you ever wonder if i smiled at home
away from your prying eyes?
did you ever wonder if i smiled at home
away from my worldly disguises?
Deep thought crushes me
with bombs and ill-will
feeds on interpretation until
i'm inhuman, a beast
i resent you for your cold streak
backwards i walk, talk, and think
i lose myself in a cradle of a sadistic hate
i slowly shake
it rings in my blood, and i salivate
like a chorus of cats in heat,
for the slightest contact,
with my sharp long looks and calls
i starve for attention
i run from myself towards a wall
there's no escaping me,
i jump and stall
your hand still clutching my ankle,
i viciously let go with thoughts,
yells, rivers, translations of my life from hell,
in the split second before
the concrete smashes my face
they cut you deeply
i smell your blood like a fiend,
and reach even deeper,
i masturbate mentally
with the strange power pain has blessed me with
i can't stop until you hit the floor
my arms i hold out,
i let you fall thru them
secretly smiling i bring you down
to my level of broken-ness
We're such dragons
Maybe if i loved myself more
i could stand to look myself in the eyes
and wipe away those sharp tears
i could blow you away,
for how you hurt me
you lock yourself in a path,
if you feel i don't translate
into your language at the time
i needed you immensely
stuck to your guns,
you watched from outside
i was melting
now shuffled by the world
you reach out for sympathy?
with my eyes i remind you
of scars only seen by god,
who keeps account of each souls pain
by weighing the bags that have grown so big,
they almost block my vision
i want to f*** you over with each decision
i'm an animal when i feel unnoticed,
unaccepted by those i build homes for in my heart
wrecked i check myself into your mind,
and you do the same at the same time
we recklessly crash thru memories
spilling them in bursts,
like long-held desire
we hesitate then reach for each other
time instantly pauses
stuck leaning forward,
our position slowly spins 360 degrees
i see the thoughts in the back of your mind,
the same way i see my crimes against your spirit
i smell you bloody
as guilt tints my vision towards reality,
i see the one of your tears inches from the floor
i lunge, grab it, it glistens stuck in the air
then hide it from the world's stare
We're such dragons
(you know i love you)
we're such dragons