Chaotic peace of mind

I knew on the day what'd happen by night
My thoughts of you just couldn't fight
Their lack of reassurance
But if I'm honest with myself
They never could

Shadowed by the thought of it turning good
I made myself believe it would
If only miracles were true
Then I'd finally get my wish
I'd be with you

What would you do if it fades away
And you're grasping at the edges
And the more you pull, the more it frays
'Til you're left

It's taken me this long just to find
The most chaotic peace of mind
I've worked long and hard to keep it going strong
It never could

What would you do if it fades away
And you're grasping at the edges
And the more you pull, the more it frays
'Til you're left and they're right

You're so far away